So I did, by accident, believe it or not a Job application to Norway.

because of that I decided it's time to make a blog in English too.

So how did this happen, that I accidentally send a job application to a Norway?
It was kind of easy after all, I was (I am) annoyed the Finnish systems and even that I did look job's from Rovaniemi (even that I'm still waiting the result from Employment and Economic Development Agency and yet I'm pretty sure that if I don't hear from them tomorrow I shall exterminate my schooling project and start to be official pain it the ass) and somehow in the list of the links to the open vacancies did have this one with English writing and told how they look artist/illustrator .. and I was like .YES! so I send my application and later realized that the job was in Norway.. jolly good me. Well, what's done it's done and I'm not to optimistic about the subject anyhow.

Well what else do I have to share? Nothing new, expect for those who don't understand Finnish and see now that I have something in English too (like there's never more than one reader per month)... so I did get in a school.. school that does make me happy.. it's interior textile artisan thingie.. I did send my papers to the school because this   Employment and Economic Development Agency- woman told me that it's good idea and go for it.

well after I did what she told.. another woman told me that "WHAT A HELL HAVE YOU DONE!" and now I have no income of any kind and loosing my mind and having a breakdown and most likely I don't even care anymore and quit the school anyway and stop trying... anything... I'll just hang on home and play artist with out any real customers.

and be sad... and be annoyed with my self and feel sad for my love ones to have to look me like that. but hey.. that's what Employment and Economic Development Agency want.

So yeah. I lied before, when I told in FInnish that I haven't been capable do any artistic stuff.. I have slowly continued one of my drawings.. it's a pencil work in A3... but got'ta say that even that is coming slow.. really slow for me. 

but I have ideas... I'm just out of fuel to do anything... never did I believe I would be at this point... that my mental heath is so weak that it takes all my strength just to keep on going.